Married to a Pedophile: The List and the Haunting Smirk!

I can remember the night so well.  We hadn’t spoken in  several days.  He was too busy, away, or was too tired.  I was a stay-at-home mom with a house full of kids all ages and stages and I wanted some time alone with my husband.  So, for the hundredth time I asked him, “Can you give me some time tonight?”  And, for the hundredth time I got a blank stare kind of like the one that translates, “I have no clue what you’re talking about, but I’ll go through this routine again to get you off my case.”

As I waited for him to come upstairs from his office, I was nervous.  I didn’t know exactly what I was going to say, but I knew I had come to the end of the rope.  I couldn’t go on living like this.  We weren’t a couple.  We were two people living in the same house with a bunch of kids.  The kids were driving me nuts — there were too many of them for me to take care of 24/7 by myself.  I was depleted.  I felt stretched to the limit.  By now, I had seven kids in ten years (not to mention the miscarriages) and I needed the help of a husband. I wanted a companion.  I wanted my soul mate!

But, he wasn’t around.  And, when he was home physically, he was absent emotionally.  Something was wrong and it needed to be fixed!              Continue reading