When I planted this flower in my garden, I had no idea that its name was “Bee Balm” nor did I know that aside from the obvious visual beauty of this gorgeous flower it attracts birds and bees.
Immediately, upon hearing that, I remembered the song “let me tell you ’bout the birds and the bees and the flowers and the trees and a thing called love”, and then I chuckled out loud. And, then I sat and reflected about how much life has changed in the arena of the birds and the bees and the story of intimacy and sex since I was a kid.
For one thing, when I was growing up, the word “sex” was never used! Never, ever, ever did I hear that word in my home, and I only heard it in school when used in reference to “being dirty.” I can almost see today’s kids rolling their eyes at this one. I know my kids sure do give the eye roll when I talk about my days of growing up!
I honestly and truly didn’t find out about “the birds and the bees” until I was in 8th or 9th grade and the details were pretty sketchy because I had to sneak a peek in Webster’s Dictionary and the only photos I could find weren’t very graphic at all. I promise you that nobody talked about sex back then! Yes, I know that people did the birds and bees thing, but they didn’t talk about it!
I was about 16 when my mother had “the talk” with me, and it consisted of “Watch what you’re doing when you go on dates because you could end up pregnant.” YIKES! Some education, huh? I didn’t have a clue. And, there really wasn’t anybody to ask because everybody’s lips were sealed on this topic. It was something you talked about when girls got engaged, I guess. Okay, I’m sure there was some talk about it before getting engaged, but it sure wasn’t like today! We blushed, we did a silly giggle, we got embarrassed, and we definitely thought we were getting away with murder if we whispered the word “sex” when we were in a group talking as highschoolers.
My kids grew up in an entirely different era, and as a parent, I’ve watched things move from the story of “the birds and the bees” to today’s times of ads on TV for condoms, sex toys, and advertisements for websites that can introduce you to a sexual playmate. Quite a distance from the days of the “Bee Balm” plant!
Good or bad, this is the time in which we live, and I believe today’s times carry an even greater responsibility on parents to have “the talk” with their kids than ever before! And, hopefully your talk will be a little more detailed and bit more God-centered than the one my poor mom gave to me. The story of love and making love (God’s way) is beautiful and sincere and pure and perfect! And, it’s a story that every child needs to hear!
As I was checking out the old “Bee Balm” plants, I thought, “Why not? What would be so wrong with going back to the basics of explaining how God designed things to be for husbands and wives? What would be so wrong with using the example of how bees carry and deposit pollen and then the plants blossom and grow? Why not use God’s beautiful creations to explain His most wonderful design for love? Would today’s kids grasp it? Or would they make fun?”
Today’s kids would not only grasp it, but they would delight in it, I’m sure. And, they need to hear the story of love and sex as told from a godly perspective! We all love hearing the truth. We each have a place in our heart for purity and beauty. And, there’s nothing that
draws kids closer to their parents than to hear them speak about God’s plan for their lives.
Go for it! Buy a few Bee Balm plants, wait for the birds and the bees to arrive, and talk on! I think you’ll be pleasantly surprised!
Love,
Clara
PS How did I explain love, sex, and God’s design for marriage to my kids? I’m sure you’re dying to know. Okay. Okay, I confess. I didn’t do so well. I bought a book that had little naked cartoonish stick figures and gave it to them to read. I still have the book, and it will be a conversation piece for time evermore!