Married to a Pedophile: “The Email Worth Thirty Years in Prison”

When I talk about being married almost forty years to a practicing pedophile, I say it with shame.  I say those words with horror.  I almost always have at least two very bad days of haunting dreams and lots of tears after I write a blog post.  Why?  Because there is still a part of me that agonizes over the fact that I was duped.  I didn’t know the man I was married to for almost four decades!  I grieve the fact that this man was so good at deceiving me and others that he got away with molesting children for all of those years!

If you are new to this blog, it’s important for you to begin here.  It’s hard to start in the middle of a story and grasp the full impact — especially with a story that is as complicated as this one.  As you are reading, take time to pause and allow the words to sink deep into your heart.  What you are reading is not just hard to read, but it’s hard to believe.

And pedophiles are counting on just that — making it hard for you to believe that they could ever commit such horrendous acts!        Continue reading

Married to a Pedophile: The “Coming Out” of a Pedophile!

The last two posts written have caused quite a stir among our regular readers as well as many new readers.  Most of the private emails I receive are asking, “Why did you stay in this marriage if it was so terrible?  Even if you didn’t know you were married to an active pedophile, why did you stay?”

I’ll repeat this again and again.  When abuse takes place a person doesn’t feel worthy of anything different than abuse.  There is a brainwashing, so-to-speak, that teaches the abused person to accept mistreatment because that is what is deserved.  There is also great fear of leaving.  In my case, how in the world would I support my family if I left?  What would happen to the children that I loved with all of my heart and soul?  Where would we live?  There is also the self-imposed prison that holds the abused person captive.  Years of abuse wears away any self-esteem and there is a powerlessness — a feeling of being too weak to escape.  And, many times there is little to no support to help the abused person get away.  And, so we stay….we stay until…….   Continue reading