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Married to a Pedophile: The Aftermath of Abuse – Part 3 of “A Father Speaks Out”

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So many people are under the false belief that once a molester has been caught and justice has been served, that the abused ones no longer feel the effects of childhood abuse.  This is one of the biggest misconceptions that society has about abuse victims, and it’s time to get educated about what really happens after a predator is found guilty.

Having lived with the mental abuse of a manipulative sociopath predator, I can tell you that there are long-term effects — the most difficult is that of trust.  But, this particular story is not about me.  This is the continuing story of a father of abused children who has willingly chosen to speak out so that others might be saved from the trauma and pain he and his family  are still experiencing.  Continue reading →

Married to a Pedophile: A Father of Abused Children – The Rest of the Story

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The last post I wrote was powerful.  It was also sad and heart wrenching.  It brought me and thousands of others to tears as we read the words of a father speak out about how his children were abused by the man I called my husband for almost forty years.  I haven’t slept a night through since this story was published.  Why?  Because I still find it so dehumanizing to think of what pedophiles do to children, and it is heartbreaking to me to know that this type of abuse goes on day after day while good, honest, caring parents are unable to recognize the abuse.  We must get better educated!  Continue reading →

Married to a Pedophile: A Father of Abused Children Speaks Out

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Today’s post is a difficult one for me to write.  Really, really difficult.  Why?  Because a father whose children were abused by my former husband is the one telling his story.  When I first met Dave and heard him speak at a child abuse workshop, I sat stunned as I heard the words he spoke with such sincerity and passion.

I asked Dave if he would consider sharing his story here, and he didn’t hesitate one second!  I wept as I read what he shared.  I wept as I thought about his daughters.  I wept as I was once again reminded of the evil actions that were committed against these precious innocent children.    Continue reading →

Married to a Pedophile: “Facing the Holidays with Abuse”

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It’s been a while since I’ve written, but I certainly have not forgotten you.  In all honesty, I’ve been taking care of myself following the sudden loss of my son. There are days when my heart feels so heavy that I don’t want to move.  But, there are also those days that are blessed with new hope and smiles, and I am most thankful for those days.

I thought it would be appropriate to get back to my story of living with a practicing pedophile so that we can continue to understand a bit more of the mind of a predator, as well to understand much more about what happens to those whose lives are touched by the actions of a predator.                  Continue reading →

Married to a Pedophile: “Why Don’t the Abused Tell?”

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It’s been a while since I’ve picked up with my story of being married to a practicing pedophile for almost forty years — without knowing it.  Just hearing the word pedophile pains me.  And, finding out that while I was sharing my heart and soul with the man I vowed to love for all the days of my life, while I was having a family with the man I wanted to be the father to my children, while I was giving my all to my marriage — while I sincerely loved this man — he was molesting children.   I cannot put into words how this has changed me.  I cannot explain the lack of trust I now have.  I cannot adequately choose the right words for the daily pain that has come into my life knowing that this man I loved clearly was causing pain and devastation to so many.  Continue reading →